This is my Story...

Letting go

2010-09-06T16:49:00.003+08:00

Its been really a long time since i wrote sth here. I totally forgot about this.
Now that i feel like writing my thoughts down, i recalled that i own this little space that i use to pour my little secrets in.
Today... I m going to write about W and hopefully i will learn to let go.

When I mean let go, i dun mean that we are together or wat.. I mean to let go is to really give up on dreaming to be with her. Its been some time. I am going to try recall the number of times i asked her out and how she rejected me on many occasions.

I remember i knew her in Asian Film History class. It was because of Asian Film History assignment that we sort of work together and manage to get the philippines Film Archieve to reply. It was really rare for a them to reply and to actually provide actual information. My guess is that most film archieve will not help students in student project. most student didnt get a reply.

Then i learned abt the Yogyagarta trip which Yanbing and friends are going. All girls trip. I wanted to go badly but one of the gal rejected because she doesnt feel comfortable that a guy tag along. I always had the impression that it wasn't W that rejected because i asked her and she said she is really "OK". Well... its just the way she do things. It was until much later than i realise from YB that it was W who object me from going. (1st time)

Before the trip, I took the initiative to sms her and asked her out. She said that "I am not a interesting person" and rejected me again. (2nd time) That's how my holiday ended. It ended with the count down 2009. I remembered that year, I screw up the whole friendship thing with MH. I chose W over MH...

Then School started with me having 2 classes with W. This is the year when I had just finished "Contained".
I remembered seeing W waving friendly at me in Contemp photo class.
I remembered how enjoyable to sit beside her in Prof practice first class.
I remembered seeing her jump up in excitement as I present my class presentation.
I remembered seeing her eat the "mochi" I made overnight(with 2 attempt failed), and how she smile as she showed me the stawberry in it.
The smile she gave... made me think that all this was worth it.

And yes.. all this while, all seem pretty nice.

Then came the ultimate killer when she wrote a very long sms telling me that she is not used to me being too over friendly. The sms came and everything toppled down. check mate.

After that, I tried to avoid her. I cannot face her at all. I went too fast and lost my footing. all was steady and because i was worried, i took a step further than i should and lose my balanced.

After the deadly sms, after avoiding her, after all that... I tried to shift my direction and focus on "sth" else. She too, showed strong rejection signs throughout. I never really talked to her until much later, near the end of semester. In msn. That is when i mentioned to her about "play"

And everything seem to restart. I gain back a friend. We were talking more this time. she came down twice to help at Osage. I think it was like dreaming. planting padi on a roof top.
then came my continuous effort to ask her out to visit Osage Gallery. 3 times i remembered. 1 time sms, 1 time in school, and 1 time when the miracle happened when i was going home.
but after the first date, which Hera came along... I never asked her out again. She agreed to help at the photoshoot in school but i totally screwed it. My film screening, she didnt make it because of workstudy. Only until the first day of school when i bump into her again. This is when I asked if she wants to watch sand castle. and she rejected me the next day.

Haizz... It's been a year since i know W. and i think its been half a yr of attempt to get to know her more. I would say her impression of me got a little better, well at least from worst to bad...
but now that I recalled... maybe i was being too positive. Its so obvious that she wasn't interested with me at all.

I have to let go now. Its really upsetting. Its like i always thought i could finish this, I always thought I got it right. But no... I did not. I got it all wrong. I failed. Its a waste. I always thought that fate or chance can bring us together. or maybe.. i just treat every coincidence as a fate thing. maybe its not. maybe its just me thinking too much. Ta man de...LEt go! let go! let go! I cannot imagine seeing her with another guy. worst still... another guy who happens to be my friend.

Big Haizzz. Henry, let go!

Fate...

2009-10-14T21:08:00.003+08:00

The end of one, the start of another.
thats how life is...
= )
I remember how things were.
K and H and I

Now things repeats
H and H and M

Its amazing how fate plays with man.
I am to chose between losing a friend, or losing a chance to settle down.

ummm

I shall let fate play me again.

Ing!!

2008-01-19T13:56:00.000+08:00

off the shelves! finally!!
Haha
A photo i took with ing before we were together. taken with a polarid camera and NAFA exhibition.
The flash like of the polarid made me shut my eyes. I feel like this photo is trying to tell me that i am blind. My other half is just beside me and i could not see it.
I am glad how things turn out now.

Insomnia Fish

2007-04-19T01:13:00.000+08:00

Did this during free time at work...
i wanted to just finish this lame joke and share it here.

Duan le de Xian

2007-04-15T16:04:00.000+08:00

Been having problems with my blog lately..
I did this short comic few days back. U got to read from right to left, and the thicker white border separates the pages. took me some time... haha but after putting all together, i realise it isnt that nice for the story. its a metaphoric approach.. i think.. hehe

Digital PAinting leh.hhahhaa

2007-02-13T22:12:00.000+08:00

i completely forgotten abt blogging. How could I?! HAHa
The Top picture is another Master piece of mine "digital Painting".. cool right?! hahahaha
ya.. been busy.. was busy preparing for NTU admission this year. i think more or less, i 80% want to get into NTU liao. but whether they want me anot..is another thing lah. My work is doing fine.. finally, boss told me that i have gain his trust and that i should not mind abt the 60hrs thing.. YEsh!! but still he said things like "responsibity. hmm.. should i read inbetween the lines? hahaha

He is always like that. Veri "humourous"
As long as i get my pay cheque.. who cares. haha
i have been drawing in office too.. eh?! no no.. is colouring. haha no dif?

I haven finish the below drawing.. as u can see.. my drawing.. still look like tat.. so dead.. hahaha i hope i can finish it.. so tiring loh.. still got to do animation at weekends.. ahh.. i m complaining.. hehe

REAL

2006-12-09T10:48:00.000+08:00

REAL, a comic drawn by Inoue Takehiko, the guy who brought u Slam Dunk. This story isnt just about wheel Chair Basketball. But i think its about living. It show how people overcome their Barrier in life and show how life is changed by just an accident. Its very inspiring..

Since Ten Commandment is over now, my company pace seem to slow down alot too. Although the next project is starting soon.. i will be doing on Layout design. for now, Me and my brother r just starting on Concept. Finally, i m given a tablet and i have been drawing again thanks to my cousin, Joyce Bday Gift, a sketch book!! I seem to improve in speed compare to my previous work(which took ages) that i did veri veri long ago. But after looking at some Artist work.. i feel there is a big big Gap. I hope i can close up the Gap.. I gotto practice more on speed painting. My colours r rather weak.. My layout seem nothing new to me. i got to look at more examples. but anyway.. Its just the start.................

BDay!!

2006-11-24T00:17:00.000+08:00

Celebrated my Bday in advance with my Bros at a void deck = )
I really want to thanks them all for coming down despite being busy... Its a pity hong didnt came, but its realli rare too see all of them. haha

Time Traveler's Wife

2006-11-13T01:11:00.000+08:00

Been Reading This book recently.. on my trains rides to work. I saw it at some random blog and since i still had some Kino Coupons, i though.. Y not? I bought it and i started my journey with Clare and Henry. = )

The story is abt this man, Henry, who times travels. He fell in love with Clare who is at present 8 yrs older then Clare. Because Henry Time travel was involuntarily, so the time and place he got transported to was very random and Clare was in love with Henry at his different ages. eg; Henry 34, Clare 8. or .. Henry 43, Clare 10..

At the start.. it was quite interesting... then in the middle portion, it got boring.. because its basically about their daily lifestyles.. only until behind.. Henry Faces his own porblem ... He wanted to stop his time travel.. he wants to be normal.. ...

And I just find out there is going to be a movie on it!! GOsh!!
Brad Pit and Jennifer Aniston !!!
http://www.cinemablend.com/forum/showthread.php?t=8612
but ... that was a old news...
latest rumours is Rachel McAdams
http://www.themovieinsider.com/movies/mid/3842/Time_Travelers_Wife_The

YEAH!!! i m so Happy.. i was telling my bro tat it can be in a movie with such a unique story and wa la.. there is going to be a movie but in 2008.. maybe its just a rumours... This is Audrey Niffenegger First novel i think.. and she hit it big!! She must be damn happy

So far i read 2 books.. Veri little hoh.. but .. they all turn out to be movie.. i dunno man.. Davinci code turn out quite wat i expect.. so its kinda boring...
then now this but i hope tis will turn out nice.. Death Note.. was also a bad translation from book to movie... so far not much impress me...

House Moving Castle

2006-10-01T16:28:00.000+08:00

Hehee yesterday. manage to leave office early to help out in moving Rui's house. We all seem to enjoy ourselve alot(Self entertain by laughing at the stupid jokes) and there always seem to be Mo Qi among us.

Then again, the joke of the day was me again. LOL.

Lun,Cheng yi and me were trying to Squeeze the mattress and wooden board all into the lift.. We were suppose to go to 3rd floor then lun and chengyi was blocked behind by the mattress. So the important task was given to me, "to press the button to 3rd floor" But...my line of sight, i only saw button 1,2 then 4, 5 then 7 and 8.. So i though this must be some "creative designer" trying to make this lift special so i press 4th floor. HAHAHAA so silly of me. So when we reach 4 th floor, while unloading the stuffs, Chengyi then spotted the "3rd floor button"!!! it was being block by the mattress. Goshh.. so lun and chengyi was laughing and laughing.. and so we load up the things back into the lift again.
i press "3" again.. but the lift went all the way up to 8th floor!!! Then it stop at every floor until 4th floor.. Then Lift went up to 8th floor again and tat piss the plp waiting for the lift. The funny part is, we actually tok but they cant see me, i cant see them.. and during our conversation, there was laughter coming behind me... which make us sound like we r playing with the lift Hehee

Then me and lun and Cheng yi were all laughing at the lift joke. Hahaha thanks to my blurneess, plp fr 8th floor got to climb all the way down to first floor. but seriously, its not my fault!! haha nvm..

Was quite suprise to see Sweehong there. Its been so long since i last saw him(when he told us he is attach) goshh.. but didnt mange to tok much with him. Zida was the pilot for the truck.. gosh.. first time drive lorry, but he seem like those uncle.. so use to the Brake got problem, gear got problem "truck". Really impress.

Then our day ended ard 12pm, raining..

Sunday, i had a special evening with my 2nd Bro, Ah boy. hehe i went to try my uncle Truck and learn some things like wheel lock.. gosh.. realli freak me out tat i though i spoiled my uncle's truck. lucky my bro was there. then after that, i had my virgin drive on Auto Car, on HONDA airwave, my bro's car. really veri different from Manual. lucky i had my bro seat beside me, feel alot secure with his warming up advise = )

Team New Caledonia

2006-08-12T05:21:00.000+08:00

Went to watch Fireworks by Team New Caledonia with my cousin today!! really nice.. golden dust water fall.. goash... is so nice!! then manage to watch a My Super Ex Girlfriend. Also quite nice!! funny but alot of dirty jokes that my cousin dun really like... = ( haha maybe because i m a guy... i find it funny, entertaining. wanted to watch Hard Candy at first...but...only some places got. hehe felt alot better = D

Chasing the WIND!!!

2006-07-24T23:25:00.000+08:00

I realise that i have been chasing the Wind.. where ever the wind blows, i go.. sound cool.. but actually, is stupid. Trying to be best in sth. trying to get into the best company.. but after all... i really think Singapore is just a Factory that produces Animation.. so wat i m chasing is actually sth i dun really like.

I realise that i m not really into animation. I realise my interest in animation is just abt Story telling and not the motion, not how good the slow in and out is. This kind of things can be improve overtime. i realise tat working experience will help only if i wanna improve in my Skill set and the way i do things.. But...it will never improve a person's story telling ability.

Maybe i m just lost. To be frank.. i wont be happy if i m doing wat my supervisiors r doing.. so my guess is, my interest don't really lies in animation. lol..

Too ambitious i guess... but i wont want to just do animation. i WONT.

PLanning for future

2006-07-16T01:43:00.000+08:00

hhaha been busy with my work.
60hrs a week is damn tiring. Wah liew...
manage to catch Superman over the weekdays. lol with weilun. i think its veri veri nice.

Oh and Birthday Present got into CG overdrive. i didnt know till my frenz told me. ok.. i was veri happy at first. because i didnt expect it. but the feeling just die out after some time.
there isnt any cash but they will screen it at Expo during the conference. they select 15 short listed..no winner. its just short listed. a cert and a trophy. it will be on MTVasia.com
but i dun see it at all. hahahaha anyway. i m veri happy.

i m thinking of to further my study.
but the problem is $$.. ok local Uni, i think i can still afford. but all my frenzs ard me keep saying working experience is more important. but seriously... with my diploma and my reel, i think i wont get any higher. only as a animator supervisor. or sth like tat. Gosh... i dun want loh. 50 yrs old but a animation supervisior?? most of my frenz think tat experience can learn alot. yes i agree but to a certain extend. Animation is a skill. i believe if the person got talent, he can just stay in the cave, and keep doing animation. But It almost look like a factory to me.. work and work.
no creative input at all. even if there is, u can see amateur doing storyboarding that doesnt tell a story..the problem with this plp is NOT that they dun have experience. but the problem is.. they dun have good education at first place. Its pretty obvious when u look at Zodaic. its not abt the render. u can put animation aside since thy dun have the time. it still sucks!! y?? no proper education!! haiz.. when will they understand. Melvin keep telling me that there is alot to learn, and a degree is a must. its not abt the skill. its abt the knowledge...

i look at CAL arts module, its so interesting!!they even got acting classes. Storyboard
but is way too expensive. 22kUSD a yr!! which is 33k Sin dollar..and its four yrs so.... 120k++.. how sia. MDA highest grant is 100k.at most.. then u still have to come back spore work.. haizz
Brad Bird(director of Iron Giant) and John Lasster(toy story) all came from CAL arts. haha

2nd choice is Art of Academy.. also need 128k just on the 4 yrs cse. most of the Pixar animators come from there. but the problem is, not everybody who enrol get to go to Pixar class. only 20 will get selected. and its not confirm tat you can get a job.
Wah lah!! its impossble. I contacted Melvin tan from Ice Age. he say in skool, roughly need 1.8k a mth to survice on food and living

As for Local university, the MDA grant can pay up to 20k if i get it. but that is if. 4 yrs is a long time. And if the skool sucks, i m gone sia. All this problem came in when i came to learn tat to work in US, a degree help in applying the Visa and a US degree will certainly help.

me and my bro wrote a super long letter to NTU. i really hope NTU can give a good and satisfying answer.maybe if they got a solid course, i can really learn from them but i hope its not like NYP... i really hope NTU has the key to my dreams. hehe

Comgraph

2006-06-20T21:10:00.000+08:00

Today is a sad day for me... comgraph, sth i was looking forward to. first of all, i dunno how my application end up in student category. then i thot was a good thing till i see the norminated works.. gosh.. i was blast away. the Open catogory was actualli quite lousy but the skool!!

the Result for Student Catogory is :
1st - Taiwan
2nd - China
3rd - Msian

i good thing i think is... "Birthday Present" is the only singapore clip norminated in student cat.. Yeah!! lol..
but realli...haizz

but the Open Catogory, Gan Chiong King get "2nd" loh.. WTF>!!!
ayah.... i think just my luck... Suay

Messenger

2006-06-18T17:10:00.000+08:00

This is what i drew recently for a submittion to TAP Lucas. I manage to get into second round, which is the test. But the test is really difficult. I hope i make it to the interview.. but i dunno what to show during the interview ya. after the interview, there will be a second interview... quite a selection process to just select 4 person. Goshh.....

Its been quit some time since i have time to write blog. I have been really busy with my work and weekends, busy doing port folio, meet up with frenzs and also slacking. now my life had sort of adjust back to the times i had in army.. Sat and sun always seem so short. but i am realli glad my boss appreciated it. One good thing abt my company is that my boss, and my collegdes, is even more hardworking than me. So at least i feel tat i m working with people like me. LOL
I recall that when i was in Poly, plp fear working with me, because i really push everything to de max. but now, i am with a grp of plp who push even further than me.
i really hope i get use to it soon. But Sparky working hrs also has its good point. The working hrs r Flexible. Can leave when ever i want, and come when ever i feel like. so there r pro and cons. i really hope i get to push myself further in this line. But i always have tis problem of not knowing where to specialise. I think that if i will be working in a Animation company, Animators is the kind of job i want. But if i were to work in a game company, I want to be working in concept Art or modeling. I think in games, animator r not realli valued. But to work as a concept art, is yet another long journey. Veri long journey.... I will try to push myself to draw at leeast a drawing everyweekend. or even a sketch.

Hard Disk Crash

2006-05-02T23:33:00.000+08:00

All my work since Poly till now are all gone. the ones left are the Jpeg files. i am veri sad. But i just if i think positivetly, its A NEW BEGINNING.

haizz working really is tiring. i hope i get use to it.

14pts!!

2006-04-20T22:40:00.000+08:00

Finally!! after failing 2 times... =(
i finally manage to get the liscence. I was really lucky tis time round. the tester was kind. this tester did sth tat surprize me. Before he give me eBrake, he actually told me first. Maybe because i was in the middle of circuit. so he also got to signal other cars to stop.anyway, He is far more better than my second tester, who always wear a sunglasses. Lucky me. Or maybe is because i drove quite ok today.(i think, not stall engine, circuit was like no problem at all, road was smooth) But dunno y hoh, i got check rear mirror in circuit, also kana 8pts.. on the road hoh, the cars really really little sia. Anyway.. Everything ended. SO LUCKY, SO RELIEVE!!

Oh, i met Melvin tan(www.melvin-tan.net), a animator from Ice Age2, over at NYP. Its kinda weird at first because its our first time we meet each other. Lucky there is Boon yee, and Ah Lee. Haha all fans of Melvin Tan. At first i email Melvin, then didnt expect he wanted to meet us up.real peasant surprize. then Melvin told me tat i am not the only 1 who email him. there is Boon Yee.
Melvin really is a talent. He has the animator's eye sia. He Really critque in a professional way sia. i am veri impress. but i didn't tok much because all i was thinking all abt my driving test tml.haiz.. wasted

１リットルの涙 - 1 litres of tears

2006-04-07T20:33:00.000+08:00

Just finish 1 litres of Tears. its a veri veri touching show, and the female lead, i think i am in love with er. HAhaha anyway, should really watch the Jdrama.
you can watch the first part here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6wRxTOm-r0&search=%5BEP1%5D%201%20litre%20of%20tears

here is a CM on Sawajiri Erika

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVuHuQ3YKsk&search=Sawajiri%20Erika

I got a job! Yesh!! i finally got my first job as a 3D animator at sparky animation.althought its far, 6days work week and long long working hrs. 60hrs+ per week. i am still willing to try. Just treat it as army loh. they even got bed there. not bad right? LOL hahahaha
I guess i can say good bye to freedom. and here i go into confinement again. Hhahaa

2006-03-28T13:52:00.000+08:00

FInally had time to finish this Low poly(485 faces) of model for Genki. i hope they like. Hahaha the requirement they set is quite hard sia. even the texture had to be within 16 colours, is like pixel atr. but is fun =)
any way, our website is up! thanz to ronald for being the Host. hehehe
http://birthday-present-huh.blogspot.com/
In this way, our domain name is unique, dun have to complicate it with ronald's web

DVD COver!

2006-03-24T08:49:00.000+08:00

Tada!!
If you are wondering what my brother and i were up to, This is the answer.
Yup! A Dvd cover and booklet showing some of our WIP,Work in progress stages. 13 pages in total.
Heheh i quite like the whole outcome. umm thanz to my free lance boss, i manage to get a special prices of A3 for $1. And the gal some how charge me cheaper i guess.
= D

2006-03-23T21:00:00.000+08:00

Weird right? Wat Happen!! Arhhh
I didnt get tis on some cat fight or wat... its by my own hands!! hahah
I think i had a nightmare or wat, when i woke up, i just see this on my forehead. Gosh...
maybe i m posses by a demon or wat ba. MUhaha

website

2006-03-17T18:14:00.000+08:00

http://www.ronaldsaw.com/birthdaypresent/BIRTHDAY_PRESENT.avi
sth is very wrong....weird
anyway

Storyboarding

2006-03-13T23:56:00.000+08:00

Took a photo for our project's small booklet we are working on. Looking back at all the storyboard i and my bro did..we realise that we put in alot of effort in this project. But without all this storyboard thumbnail, "Birthday present" wont turn out like how we expect. I realise the most common problem with short film is without proper storyboard planning, the clip with either end up focusing on the wrong part of the story, or adding unneeded scenes that is redundant. So i think is worth doing all the thumbnails =)

But..
its just not my luck... i guess, Koei dun want me(despite i went through the 3 stages), lucas... no reply at all...Genki, ok, at least they seem interested, but they r not realli into animation but texturing... haiz

just keep trying loh
LOL
went for Genki interview

Slacking

2006-03-05T01:19:00.000+08:00

I have never slack like this for a long period of time. I think since Army? I basically do nothing for a week!! Wah liew. ok lah, play game loh. play like i never play b4. but i think i m too timid or wat.. RE4 is so...HAHA but today i manage to replay again. I realise... it quite easy leh. seriuos! hahha and ZOE!! Wa, i tell u ah.. its anot bad game. ranking slightly below Metal Gear leh. no lah... no as good. but maybe its because of Gundam seed, so i like ZOE2. thanz to Nicholas ya(he got me the game) =) Shadow of colussus hoh.. not bad lah. but once u figure how to attack, its easy too. but each boss is unique loh. but the stort line, isnt that strong.. just like ICO (same creator)
Koei game ah...err.. never play leh. LOL
Haizz...although i been playing, but i cant really play whole heartedly. sign... my frenz just told that Koei reply will only come after 2 weeks... i had applied 2 more jobs without sending my demo reel. both, game company... i think i m heading at a wrong direction? hahaha
dun care dun care
SLACK like i never slack b4, stone like i never stone b4!

(oh ya the Toy on Top is ANUBIS! Nice hoh, from ZOE2!! )

Gesture

2006-02-24T12:13:00.000+08:00

Finally, i started using pencil again to draw some gesture using harry as my model. I still dunno if i have improve but the more i look at the drawing, the more i want to throw it away. anyway, i did it just in time to show during my Koei Interview. Well... i dun know if it helps, and i dun know if Koei wants me anot. haizz i really wish tehy could get back to me asap
during the interview, they keep asking "wat games u like to play" gosh.... and i say MGS, by Konami and the jap guy give a veri black face to me. LOL!!

Emily and ???

2006-02-21T03:54:00.000+08:00

Haha..I am going to do a short short animation using star wars dialogue. i wonder how it will turn out. haiz... try and keep trying!!

3dsmax Connect sucks

2006-02-19T02:05:00.000+08:00

really sad.. been trying to connect the head to the body and many problem just keep rising. wasted the whole afternoon and evening on just CONNECT!!
CRAP! i wonder how Harry did it. Haizz
=(

Spline Body

2006-02-17T10:10:00.000+08:00

Manage to squezze some time to finish the body using my Emily's hand and leg. made by my bro,harry.

What is "Animation"

2006-02-09T15:12:00.000+08:00

My theme park has finally come to an end. This 2 weeks has really been tiring. but to be honest, Phrase 2 really isnt tat hard. i didn't give my 100% at all. Had been watching Gundam Seed and slacking hahaha Shhh..
Although its alot more $$ than Phrase one, but because this time is working with my Brother. (Lucky he is willing to get invovle in this project)

"Two are always Better than one, If one falls down, his frenz can help him up" (i think is from the bible, a verse or sth)
This is from a card from my frenz, Shuzhen, who left to Australia. She gave me at the airport when she left. =) It really means alot to me.

I am really lucky to have Harry, my bro
Not for him, i alone wont beable to complete "Birthday Present" at all. ANyway, i think the short film could not be complete by 2 person, at least a team of 5 i guess... but we made it! Our main objective of the film is to ... Tell a story.
there are other objective as well
-to show our animation
-To relate the story with people
-To at least have a presentatable clip in out reel other than the projects we did in School which is all crap!

But the truth fact is... we didn't meet one of the objective and a important one. OUR animation!
So far, Only 2 company saw our reel. The reaction is very different. the Japan Game company, Koei said it was "impressive!"(i knew it from my frenz) i was very relieve and confident then to heard tat. Then we submited to a US company. They Called!! YES! They called. Many of my frenzs submited the reel but no reply. But... they called to actually ask permission to change our application from Character animator to Modeller or Painter. GOsh !!! It means that our animation didnt make it! He say it was "rather Weak"in our animation, but he explained that everything looks veri nice, the lighting, texture, modelling and the filming, how we put things together.. Its nice, and he could not believe that we did it on our own. he kept asking "Did u 2 really did tat clip without anyone help?" Hahaha ok... but till now, No news for interview.. SAD

So Wat is Animation then?
Most people Thought animation means Cartoon, or even people grade animation through the overall look. But what i was taught in school is difference.

Good Animation is just like Art, it can be sujective. People have different opinion in it. I remember in DMD, i have this particular teacher who sees animation as, "acting". The Character, its not only have the movement to be real, when u animate it, its must beable to react to the surrounding, to make it look like, the person inside is.. Living, is for real. So we actually had an extra Module on just "Acting"... how to control "power CEnter" and all tat. Thanz god there isnt a test for it. But that particular teacher wasnt really welcome in my school. He actually commented that Pixar and Studio Ghibli has poor animation skill.. and not to say IG production and Square Enix. (at this point of time, if u are reading this, u might be "?????" and guess wat.. this teacher actually hold a very high place in DMD.)

Then there are other teacher who thinks his "thinking" is wrong. And animation like Pixar, we shold try to achieve. at that point of time, we students.. were really lost. Everybody likes Pixar, nothing wrong with it right? haha

My opinion is... the animation, at least, the movement must be believeable, the weight shift all tat. The animator has to get the main principal of animation correct. Then Factors like
-What clip are u doing
-What type of character are u animating
-That particular shot in the storyboard, Wat is the importants of the shot for?

there are many factors u need to consider. Most importantly, It has to be "Entertaining"!
Who cares if the character react to some cat running by or wat (i am not saying is not important) but during the story board concept planning, you have to really consider "What u want to tell the Viewer at that particular shot?"

One thing i learn from my teacher(the one who apphersis on acting) is that Storyboard is the most Important process in a film production but its really weird when i look back at the project we did with him, the storyboard is really lousy. But he taught us that in storyboard, the drawing is not really important but the panel has to beable to convent the msg to the viewer.
And now, after doing "Birthday Present" i would like to add that, not only it has to convent the msg, but ask urself, how does it contribute to the story development, or the character development. U can't just waste airtime like that.

The above, is just some of my personal opinion of What i think Animation and film is about. (i might be wrong=) For now, my plans is that if i could not fit into lucas animation, i will keep on trying and this time, concentrate on our animation. Just animation, no lighting, nor texture. If i really get into Koei, i can use the time to build my port folio during weekends. Its really never ending. I and my brother, really want to go into lucas, the reason behind it, to get involve in a Feature animation MOvie i hope. I will Keep TRying!!! MUhhhahha

Doing to many things in 1 time!!

2006-01-21T16:48:00.000+08:00

20th.. Is both my driving test and my Koei Submittion of port folio
SUck!i was spending too much time on my port folio i guess.. didnt get enough sleep.
okok all these are Excuses but i realli sucks at driving
i thot i could pass this time but... Haizz
i FAILED. even worst than the previous scorce
okok i didnt have enough lessons i guess and i was nervous. next test is exactly 3mths from now.
then i was so dejected, depress and blar blar. when i reach home, stil got to continue on my reeel and Resume. SUCKS! okok But at least after handing the Reel to Zhi ren. his feedback was "IMPRESSIVE" alot of the grp leader in Koei were impress. Haha he realli made my day sia
after that i felt alot better.

OK..just as i thot i can have a break, my free lance called me. WTF!! Theme park design PART2. China have made some changes. I am both happy and piss. Happy that China is realli going to build the theme park, SAd because they remove alot of our designed rides!! Stupid ass and the theme park from Lost work become Rojar!! Wah lah.. China realli got some taste.

Well at least is another pocket money, another payment. i heard is the same amount. i realli hope

one after another
So busy...

Well i think driving, once i get a stable income, i can slowly learn. then it wont be that Bad.3 mths... umm
Back to my spring cleaning..Sayonara

Birthday Present is COMPLETE!!

2006-01-16T19:47:00.000+08:00

okok i am really excited! its DONE. okok i am left with Background music for Scene 2 and the CREDITS.. So many plp to thanz ya. okok Now gonna do my demo reel
like abit late hoh
hahahah

Am i Spending to much time on my "Future"

2006-01-15T22:23:00.000+08:00

My frenz, hong, mention to me that.. i realli must not shut myself at home too often. Its not that its not good to concentrate on my work.. but i got to get a life.
Ya.. he is probably right. for the past 2-3 mths, i totally cut myself off from the world. its veri bad.. the only person i meet up are my Sec sch frenz, and only at nearby areas. i never even step into Town for so long... only once, when i meet my client. HAHHA i was even shock to see that the Mac at Orchard MRT is gone... Goshh

My Short Film "Birthday Present"(my Elder bro come up with tis title) should be able to complete by tonight-without BG music.... I am really excited to put everything together. but.. i am also quite... worry. everytime i do sth, there is always room for changes.. Sian0.5

I told my frenz that i sacrifice alot for tis thing. Realli alot.But was it worth it?
YES it is.
firstly which idiot wont want pride.. Commandos.. To be frank, when i saw them in No1 uniform during NDP, i realli envy them. i could be one of them, with Thailand wing and all that. After the 1.5 yrs of suffering as a trainie, got the red beret all that..
But I know if i continue to stay in CDO, i would surely lost touch of my skills. not that i cant wait..but i realli think i need to do sth. i got to spend my 1 yr wisely. anyway, i had completed my CDO training, Airborne Jump, ATP,Road March, Boatman training, and went for many missions.. All i can say i didnt Chao Keng! the only time i skip most of my training was the starting part when my leg was realli pain. Other than that, i think i am far more better off than some of the plp there, who think ways to Escape..Shitty, and they are COmmandos?! Stupid but its the truth.. that y i always believe, never judge a person by the unit!! which some plp, nowadays still think Officer is a cut above the rest, my ASS loh. anyway..
.... Its always like that. The grass on the other side is always Greener. When i was in CDO, i realli envy my frenz who are doing design. Now that i got a Design vocation, whihc is exactly wat i wanted, i still like tat... HAHAH
But till now, i haven regret. Not only i improve my skills in my design post in army, i get to know 2 person that made my choice worth it. I get to know my upper study, Zhi Ren, who has a total duplicate of my interest and also a twins. the other person is Nicholas who taught me alot of stuffs, not only in 3D but other software, haha to make me not so Mountain Turtle.
Tis 2 person are veri impt to me i guess. And some other plp like Chen Fu also show me how design can be done.I am realli gracefull that i end up in FSD. Realli. i think i have no regrets.

Haha With all the things line up, i still dun have the mood to CHiong my port folio. wonder y.. Over confident? no confident? or... LAZY??! wait till the last min then CHiong? hahha then i will start regretting(tats me)
20th is also my driving. so i must realli plan.
I decided for my demo reel, i will use my cousin's "Can the Angel". i had been wanting to use it but.. nomrally, people wont use songs that have Vocal for Demo Reel. I hope Koei Wont mind. No lip sycsn animation. but i manage to finish my "walk" cycle over the night. looks a bit like Rough animation but still its OK for now.

i today Type so long is because of my render... so SLOWWWW

Last Lap!

2006-01-14T08:45:00.000+08:00

I finally got the photo from Miss Pat!3 twins from DMD. 1 pair, my senoir, Zhi ren & Zhi en, the other 2 my junior but i dun realli know them. HAha Miss Pat is also a twins. So Funny!!Zhi ren,who i get to know from FSD is almost like a carbon copy of Harry. Hhaa we often joke that we should exchange brothers.

Anyway...
Its the Last LAP!!
20th Jan. Ren told me that 20th is the submittion date for Koei Port Folio. I am so so Excited!! (for those who dun't know,Koei is a Jap company that produce famous Game from the Romance of The 3 Kingdom Series)
Just when i was on cloud 9, my frenz, Ben told me, he got a JOB!! concept artist job.
WTF! and the pay is "above 2K" LUCKy Bastard! hahah but i am happy for him ya.. at first i felt veri Jealous.. but now.. Probably he can set the bench mark? hahah
i still Wanna Try Lucas no matter Wat...
Then lun told me sth even more Shocking.. I can go grading?! but..i haven been goin there for almost 1 mth. even i also dun know how to go back sia.
On the 20th is also my 2nd attempt of my driving test!! so many things going on sia
SHIT!! and my driving was really bad. had alot of problem on the slope... y leh... also dunno... Stupid clutch. i hope tis monday, my driving in circuit will be better.
anyway, i think i am confident in driving now. just tat the slope... haizzz maybe is because my frenz told me on how he failed the 2 time TP when he roll back on the road.

No More Theme park drawings!! arhh

2006-01-09T21:35:00.000+08:00

FInally, my CLient have flew to CHina. Cant say much abt this free lance. Hehe but its done! Been Thinking alot, wanted to write alot in this blog, but was too busy for the whole week. My hand just cant stop drawing! its a rush work. Lucky me, the client didnt have any stupid changes. hehe, my colouring also improve toward the last few drawing.
Been thinking, After my "Birthday Present" project, i will finish my demo reel, which i am still considering to use my cousin's, Joyce song, or use Sound loop to have a tune out...
Pro and con ba.not sure yet
now my Bro thinks that our demo reel should have at least a walk cycle and a Jump animation.. WTF!! siann... never ending..tired sia..

while drawing, i been thinking. images just keep popping in my mind.. i think am having a crush. a crush with someone i should not have.. Veri bad.. It just cant go away. Hope it will go off soon.
anyway, crush dun last long.. but i got a feeling, this might last for some time.

Count DOWN!?? hehe Nahhh

2006-01-01T18:09:00.000+08:00

Happy New YR!
tis yr had a slightly dif New Yr count down. instead of standing infront of the Stage and count stupidly, we actually walk off and leave the "party" lucky it was a free Ticket. or else i would be damn piss. Its not happening at all and the place is damn big that it looks so empty. Gosh..
anyway, we make our way to the hawker center at Harbour front and ordered Carrot cake and sat just outside the hawker center(thanz to Zida's suggestion). just as we started to eat, fire works start brigthen the sky. First time i can eat, Sit, and watch fireworks..

Utada - Passion

2005-12-13T12:40:00.000+08:00

My frenz just told me abt Kindom Hearts 2 Theme song. I kind of like Utada MTV.. but was wondering, if this is also from his husband. His husband did her MTV for songs like, Traveling and Final Distance
U can watch the "Passion" MTV but its not the KH intro. hehee but there is still some 2D animation
http://www.youtube.com/watch.php?v=ninBaVNZils&search=Utada%20Passion

My Fav Game

2005-12-13T11:08:00.000+08:00

Among all the games, i still prefer Sonic. dunno y. hahah after so long, after i show Connie how to play sonic..i also get addicted again. almost complete the game infront of her.haha
i love my first Game so much. Its a Jap version(Top) and the concept art is So cute and nice! hehehe
but the Sonic 3 was in American version(below), the art is so much lousy

Drawing 24 hrs

2005-12-11T06:44:00.000+08:00

just woke up in the middle of the night to reslise i have slept for almost 14hrs.staying over night at the National library drawing comic on the 16th floor, really is tiring. 8pages.. haha I and my bro really push ourselve to our limit. But we didn't won anything. Sad..
i guess there are many reason to lead to our failure in comic. Firstly, we were not train in drawing comic. We are veri use to doing storyboard then comic. Many might not beable to tell the difference, maybe the biggest diffence is in storyboard, everything is 4:3 but in comic...

Secondly, we were quite slack. the plp there r really hard core. keep drawing n drawing. we were, haha, talking among our dmd frenzs.

Thirdly, towards the end, we realise sth unusal. there was a guy, who is a judge, kept talking to a guy and a gal.Not only the him, so as all the grp leaders and even the organisers. We were wondering, r their drawing so good? Damn it! y didn't i think of that? among all the contestant, there are "students" from FUNics Comic Academy. Haizz, then just like we expected.. those 2 realli got some prices...

the worst part, is we waited another 2hrs just hoping to get the drawings back..but they say its under the rules and regulation that we cant take it back. haizz
But
-the food was good
-there were a few babes that i didnt approach.. wat a waste!
-i manage to catch up with some old frenzs.
-i get to stay in 16th floor which is a restricted area.
-i and my brother realise we can actually finish story board within 24hrs and not the usual time frame in our school days. we were quite happy with the drawings..but.. too bad cant bring back.
-The winner wasnt from the FUNics Comic Academy but my frenz's boyfrenz got first.

Childhood

2005-12-08T02:31:00.000+08:00

Connie has been coming to my hsE for almost everyday. Mum and my elder brothre has tried all means to stop her from coming to my hse. I guess she is starting to get the idea,"she cant disturb me." My project is really wrapping up with Harry's return. Soon, i am gonna add music. Thanz to Leo, i got a pool of sound loop but still gonna sourse for more.
Back to Connie, my brother and i were chatting abt how connie future would turn out. I am sure his future would be far more brigther than me.. but my bro think his life gonna be quite pathetic.
Poor Connie gonna end her childhood in our hse. Tis is her only time when she would have no stress, no work, and her father and mother isn't ard to accompany her. Soon she will be starting her Primary at Singapore Chinese Girls School(i think...)Goshh... then she won't have time at all.
Then my brother told me something interesting abt my Childhood. He said that i and Harry love drawing when we were very small, even b4 our Kindergardens. haha. We actually used crayon to draw on the wall. haaha and my bro got scolded because of that. HAHAA
And after my mother bought us our veri first Crayon.. guess wat, Harry ate the crayon!! HAHA toxic crayon somemore... Eek..According to my bro, he said when he come upstairs, he only see Harry mouth was in green crayon, and was sucking a brown crayon Stick.(actualli my bro wasn't sure it was Harry or me) Eekkk... then later my mum bought us another set of crayon, a Non-toxic one.
i guess thats y Harry can draw better than me.. maybe i should start eating Crayon?
eek...

Connie

2005-12-03T04:25:00.000+08:00

Connie is my dear cousin. she is 6 yrs old tis yr, she looks just like any other gal just that....
She is not cute..
at all
Arhhh...
After spending whole day teaching her how to play "Sonic" and when i thot i can finally have some time on my project, i was wrong...
She is realli an attention seeker..
just after i leave her my SEGA console, i heard she yelling...
Dash back and see, Goshh... she is actually trying to pull the cartridge of the Set without even switching off the set.!!
Idiot.. i yell at her the moment i saw it...Lucky i came back and see wat she is doing, or else my only SEGA...cant imagine.

She just want someone to watch her but... even if my elder brother is there, she wants me to be there too... she just want attention.
So for the past 3-4 days, i have not been able to concentrate on my project.. + harry is on his Holiday trip to Hong Kong(her GF won it through a lucky draw.. so lucky) so i guess i have to postpone my project and continue to be jobless for a few more days...Arhhh
Tis feeling sucks...

Blue Sky

2005-11-30T19:36:00.000+08:00

Wat i did last night. its a photo in one of the scene : D

Console Games...

2005-11-30T14:32:00.000+08:00

For 3 days, my uncle has brought her daugther to our hsu to baby sit.. gosh..she been really irritating. keep talking to me when i am trying to do work. anyway, lucky we still had a X-box to keep her accompany.(i lend my PS2 to my sec frenz since i am doing project)But after looking through all the games we had, i realise only 1 game is suitable for her, age 5-6 or 4... thats is Bust a Move 4. Bubble puzzle... realli a stupid game but she seem entertained by it. but after 2 days of playing the games, she eventually got bored with it. Today, she wanted a new game.. sth new.. but i realise nowadays the games from console are mainly targeted at teenager rather then children. I finally found a game tat i thot was suitable, Xbox's Sonic(i got it in PS2 too) ... Goshh.. its so complicated. Even i also need some time to figure my directions, where i m heading.. with that kind of sonic speed, u get lost easily. 3D is far too complicated for children! i let her have the controller and she just keep jumping at a stupid corner.. Lost..
then an idea stuck me. Y not the game sonic but not 3D? haha SEGA..
i went to dig my cupboard, Ta daaa , SEGA, my favourite console. hhehe and of course my favourite game, Sonic.
But after explaining the game to her, she seem amaze by the game, and excited too. handed the controller to her... only know how to jump on the spot.. after explaining to her umpteen times.. she can barely pass Act 1...haizz i feel like vomiting blood. nvm.. i think is because of my character, like my frenz said, haha, impatient.
then i left her for a moment, just to eat my lunch, but came back to see, she is oredi giving up, trying to pull the game cartirdge from the set, with the SEGA on..Wah liew... i scolded her for the first time. she seem piss.. but i m more piss... haha my SEGa...haha

Baby Sitting

2005-11-28T19:44:00.000+08:00

Today, not much progess on my project, all because my uncle brought her daugther to our hsu, for us to look after.. i m realli not good with kids.. anyway, i was sick i think. after showing her "Finding NEmo" in CHinese dub... (lucky i got DVD or else...she is abit more to the China side)
then after the movie, i just fell asleep all the way till 5pm..goshh..i tried getting up many times to at least do sth on the project, but i doze off 2 times on bed. HAhaa then i gave up. i guess i m realli sick.. or lazy? hahaha

Debts

2005-11-25T04:13:00.000+08:00

My mum break the news to me. Abt the debt on my Dad/Bro's company. He kept saying is my BRother's fault tat now we going r going to have more debts to pay...so much more. its kinda complicated.. anyway.. on top of our debt, we just add another $100 000 to it, just because my brother didn't pay the "fee" on time,and keep delaying, avoiding calls fr bank and tat HDB has taken back the shop. Goshh... at first still got a bit of hope, hoping the MP can help us..now..even they also think is hopeless. and me, Helpless.. i dun think even if i get a job, the peanut i earn can help my mum. my poor mum.. been working her whole live. I really want to make it big someday. I really want but.. how? hahha Goshh.. and my stupid brother can just sit whole day watching TV, not feeling anything. really hopeless.. how??he seem to believe sth is going to happen. kept watching TV. how can someone watch TV and do nothing? WTF.........

24th NOV

2005-11-24T19:15:00.000+08:00

Today is my Birthday. and guess wat.. i m staying home. no programs no nothing. really dun feel like doing anything at all. nothing special but i still have the "lost" feeling. So many things to do. my frenzs did ask me out today to enjoy but i didnt. hehe i guess i really dun have the mood to go out.
One good thing is that my project, its finally completing. but still, the story in Day 3 is not really animated. Lots of work to be done and the rendering... our actual dateline, Nov 24. didnt meet. wat am i doing sia. haizz.. i guess its realli too much of work for just 2 person. but one good thing is the music. Lucky i got my couin Joyce to provide us with song. Her songs are reali great! gosh.. and we manage to squeeze at least 3 songs in
"Letter to Santa" for the intro. a jovial song for a opening mood for Emily.
"Fairy Tale Story" for scene 1 too.When Vovo gave her the "dog" present.
and last "Track02" for the whole of Scene 3. I and my brother really love all 3 songs. I really must thanz my cousin. not for her, we are death meat, i realli cant imagine the whole animation, no dialogue, just sound loop...and of course i need to thanz so much plp for assisting my project not only giving advice on story(too many plp), technical issue(nicholas) and also frenzs who lend me their com for me to render.
I really hope i could get a good job. and then start paying debts to those who lend me their helping hands. too many plp liao.
few days back my cousin, she told me she went to meet up with tis local singer. then the local singer actualli wanted the song Fairy tale Story. Goshh.. so wat if she got award in Hits award?! its my cousin song, how can she just use it to sing? lucky my cousin didnt fell for it.
My cousin, i wonder, will she be a star? i really want to help her.i think she got talent.

Mary :D

2005-10-31T21:37:00.000+08:00

Well, tis will be the first time i gonna put sth nice in my blog. hehe
today i went to meet 1 of my frenz. A special one. her name is , Mary...

i know Mary when i was posted to Mindef. Everyday, i will take the bus 961 or 963 to work. Then.. on this bus, we get to see familiar faces. one of them was Mary...
there was once, i remember tat night was Zouk out at Sentosa(but i didnt went) I and Secondary school frenzs were scrolling alone the beach, fr Padawan beach to Siloso Beach.. then i saw a familiar face, Mary! but tat time, i didnt know here yet.
after that day, we didnt speak.. until one day after weeks, i had no choice but to sit beside her.. then.. finally, i started break the silent. then after, she became my Bus Buddy. hehe everytime, if we manage to sit to the same bus, we would start chatting. its really was a wonderful thing to chat with her. hehe our journey seem to shorten alot. hehe and the funny part was.. we didn't even know each other's name, until weeks later.
everything has an end.... unfortunately, i ORD... leaving Mindef, leaving her. haizz
its a sad thing but we still manage to keep in contact now and then. Today.. its the first time after i ORD, that we first met outside. it was a short meet. she was suppose to return me my Corrine May CD.. and lend me her Cai Chun Jia CD. hehe but i after handing me the CDs, she left. min after she left, then i realise the CD was brand NEW!! i was so surprize and gave her a call immediately. hehe i was realli touch. she said that was "a token of our friendship" Realli Touched ya!! hehe

Super super stress

2005-09-13T20:03:00.000+08:00

Oh my..
goshh..
my bank,
the amount been depleting since i bought the P4 3.0 computer.. cost me $680
although mum gave me $500, is still not enough.
i own my bro $65.
Wat should i do? i still got driving.. SHit !!
Karate my ass.. now i realli got to worry abt Job hunting
Lucas paid sucks for probation period.
1k!! just 1K and after 3 mths, if they dun want u, u got to pay 5k?? Wat The F!!
Koei.. not needing any more pl..
wat choices r left?
Egg Story
Southern Star..
and..?? EA?? nope... haizzz
my project.. i Cant sleep
i Qurantine myself for a whole week. AT home!! not even going out.
haizz

"Called"

2005-08-26T14:02:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, i finally called her..
well, just as i expect, she was busy...
wanted to ask if she will be free tat night, then she had sth on.
then i msg her if she would be free tomz night.. then she replied" I got class. Sorry M v busy nowadats. Next week onwards till end of yr, going to be busy so dun think can meet up. Another time maybe."
So i guess it means tat i wont be able to meet her till next yr i guess... WTF!
some kind of frenz!
anyway, i must admit tat i had a kind of attraction to her, defininetly not looks... but sth else which i myself is puzzle.. or maybe i m just curious..
dun know.. still working on my own project.. finally started rough animation.. but.. I reall dun know.. my future realli is one whole blur ya.
SO noisy.. my neighbour's renovation really is irritating!

NO progess...

2005-08-23T01:32:00.000+08:00

My life seem to come to a point where i think there is no progess, no improvement.. basically, if my life is to be plot on a chart, its will look like a straight line, no ups and down.
Never really done my project much, never read any book, never really go out w Gals lately..
but i had a "different" weekend. Friday, watched "Land Of The Dead" w Lun, because it was his birthday, but no one seem interested.
Instead of going out w my Sec sch frenzs, i went out w Nicholas n Chen Fu. Had a great TIME! went Sim Lim to visit Kok Kiong at Fonny. Then Nicholas shows me his PSP.. realli lucky guy ya. mum struck 4D and wa la, rich! then Nicholas treat us Dinner tat nice B4 we watch Vialiant. Ok lah.. but it looks not complete some how...
Sunday had gathering w DMD frenzs. realli had a great time w all of them, esp Bug. she n I has sth in common, i guess the Lingo ba. then Harry came along. Glad he came.. Then watched Movie again (second movie in a week.. $$$) "Must Love Dog" hehe REALLI NICE!! Kind of remind me of Serendipity.
All this.. i been realli wasting my time n $ in entertainment.. Shit! play for so long... then moment ago, Pei Fen struck my mind again.. "Y i dun see her online at all?" i dun realli know this, but i m Curious abt her. maybe is the way she close her door on me, or maybe is because i had a crush w her?
its definitly not abt looks.. but then? her character? her Strong n subborn characters? her Eyes with that contact lense that i can actualli see deep into her eyes? hehe i seriously dun know, but if given a chance, i would want to turn back time n, send her home... stupid me!
I hope i learn my mistake.. made a few Gals disappointed w me.. realli alot.. alot of regret, but i have to learn fr mistake ya
I Have to.. If i realli have to name the mistake i made, i guess realli are too many..
Finally, the card i made for Conyee, has safetly reach her hands. But it was a bit to late thot.. if oni i had send it earlier.. she wouyld have been happier on her bday. we were suppose to meet up tat day but i think i was too cold or wat, we never meet up in the end, Cancel. reason :got to do stuffs for dad.
then later at night, i sms her Happy Birthday then she replied veri coldly:thanz.Glad tat u remembered...
but i didnt want to spoil the surprize so didn;t say anything till Sunday when i asked her if she likes the card i made, then she reply: I didn't recieve anything fr u, thot u stop doing Cards....
SAD.. the card didnt even reach her on Sunday.she did said :i was alik disppointed when i din get ur card. I thot u forgotten. I duno y i'll feel tat way.Haha although its not tat i got expectation towards it. Maybe I m used to recieving it."
i m both elated n Sad.. well at least she is expecting my card but sad thing is, she was alittle disappointed on her Bday.. Late again..

I realli hope my live can have some improvement

Its been some time. . .

2005-08-11T16:45:00.000+08:00

Its realli been some time since i write my blog. Didn't know y i stop at first place. i guess everything went well since i went into FSD. Well FSD, after all, was my dream Job. Tell me which NSF get to build their port folio and work in a air-con + own table +wear Civic environment+do stuffs related to port folio? i guess i am realli lucky. goin out with Rui Zhen was also a miracle for me i guess. went out a couple of times but i guess, we realli have a gap. the gap grew bigger after she went France. she meet tis guy.. n Blow!
i think she is just bored with Singapore. i guess sooner or later i will be bored too. Even start goin out with Shu Zhen recently during the December 19. i remember she wish me Happy Birthday ya :D then we started goin out, to esplanade, our first date, quite memorable, even took photo
but i realise we had a gap. a gap tat cant be close up. maybe religion. not sure.
Then my life in FSd started. i start the virtualising thingy after ZhiRen leave for Leave
gosh... realli took some time but its my first attempt to do 3D i guess Cpt Ang "JPS" project. it didnt realli screen in the JPS conference. the minister were there but. . . . .
anyway its sad but i got to accept it. but just few weeks back, mu video was screen in "M3" meeting. Thanks to LTC Ngoo. :D
ya
then i realli had a hard time "digesting" nicholas attitude, but everything change. he realli is a nice guy. He was realli my great help in my projects in FSD, always providing solutions for me. ya.. realli help full. even gave me a watch which i always use for Running n Swimming. he realli is a great guy. a guy, i think has pride in his work. realli a unique guy ya. when ever i teache him sth, he would surely find another solution for wat i teach. Haha then i learned sth in the end.

Then there was many event then nothing realli interesting happen. well.. i realli think in FSD, i made alot of "common interest" frenzs. yup! realli is like same interest ya. maybe its the same course. there Was Lai the scholar, Jeremy, who likes claymation, then now Kok keong who likes anime. hehe i m realli lucky guy ya!
then there was "retreat" at Changi Chalet. met a few of my COMMANDOS frenz on the walk to Changi beach ya. realli happy to see them ya
hehe. but i was "envy". seeing them. but i pull myself together. i decided to visit them. James Eu, my CDO buddy!
hehe tat night, i sneak into the recreation rm, there, i saw them again. so happy. Then James Eu, presented me the Siletto, the Commandos dagger! gosh, but he didnt passs me the photo. haizz. then i met ROn, i told him.. i envy him as Commandos, get to go Taiwan for Altec. then he said sth i will never forget. "the grass on the other side is always greener"
wEll although he always talk cork but he realli know to use words.
ya i guess he is right.
then after the retreat, everything went back as per normal. i go to work, work hard, get praise, and when i reach home, start doing my project.
the project was quite draggy. anyway, we made alot alot of changes.
gosh.. today realli been a day. my leave start today, but... today just went to Corrine May Concert. Realli impress! but sth sad happen today. . .
I was suppose to meet Eunice today, but she said she got sth on. she had some recuitment thing in her SIM school. then after hanging out with Zida n her Gf, which i think i m out of place, she came late! came at the dot at 7.30pm. GOshh... i realli is disappointed. then she said she had to go off after the concert. i realli dunno how she think but i m reallu piss. after the concert, i asked her "do u have anything to tell me?" she say "Y". then i continue"actualli, u r attached, r u?"
then she asked" Huh?who do u heard fr?" u saw us? or?"
i m realli puzzled.. y does she has to ask so much qns, just say YES la. then i said "i saw it" then she was speehless then said "actualli ya." haizz...
cant she be a bit more direct??
then the worst part is... she was late on the date. then later she even leave early, just after the concert. Who the hell she think she is? Idiot! can someone just go catch a movie with a frenz then say Bye, after the movie? cant ma.
then she never feel anthing oni until i msg her, saying she is being rude. Gosh... anyway, wasted, didnt see Joyce. she was realli happy meeting Corrine May
hehe corrine actualli remmeber her dream, her dream of getting a band. well Joyce is one more step close to her dream but me.. still long? not sur.. realli depends on where i aim.
Today, realli was disappointed with Eunice, i realli think doesnt care abt meeting me ba
some kind of frenz, but she realli is in a difficult position ya.good frenz birthday + concert.
haizz. but if i her, i would chose concert ba. birthday, still got so many plp. dunno her lah, say she got friendship problem. i think i going to lose one more friend AGAIN.

DOWN Down dow.....

2004-11-04T15:11:00.000+08:00

My life for me has now come to the down period..
everything tat seems doing well last week turn to have a change in luck..
-My place in FSD might not be confirm..
-I might not be able to wear CIVic to wk..
-Harry have a high possiblities tat he cant join me in FSD.
-My life starts to be veri long and lonely...
-The challenge for me in FSD presentation seem veri ...unsure...
Maybe i am being too optimistic..
Think too much again

"Look at the bright SIDE" i told myself...
-I get to know This very nice guy,Zhi Ren, in FSD tat seem to be a duplicate of me...haha we share almost the same interest.. or maybe i am stuck in Hendon too long,n never get to meet any "one of my kind".
-My Brother is coming back more often and finally starting to do something abt his Port Folio...
-AND most of ALL... I am finally getting my own Room**!!!YEAH!!!**
-My MUM also get me a new cupboard...so sweet of her..

Actually after writing so much abt so many fortunate thing happening on me..i find myself...
Veri Lucky...
hahaha
Gosh.. got to pack my room liao.. At FSD pack for moving to new place.. come home must pack for new room..Hahaha

YESH! Finally...

2004-11-01T01:20:00.000+08:00

YESH!!
I have been waiting for this moment since i got downgraded..
Posts OUT!
And now here i am.. at home..not worrying abt wat time to book in(its a SUNDAY).
After i went through so much trouble-email here and there and MRI scan,
i think its worth it.The new place i am at in MINDEF..FSD Future System Directorie
Is a place where plp plan for the future..alot of Scholars in my office...so Stress

When i told my Commandos Officers tat i am going there.. They all give me a Shock Face..
"Isn't tat only Scholars Go?Why r u going there?"
Both my OC and Doctrine Head give me a shock face.
HAHA
B4 i leave, i told my OC(Officer Commanding) "GOOD LUCK!"
"ya... I realli need tat."and tats wat he replied...
WHao LAU!!!
Y is my OC like tat huh..??!!give him wishes he still think i wan to suay him
Haizz...

Anyway.. my first day there was a culture shock..
MINDEF is located at a hill top
Walking Up the Bloody Slope sure took some time up by foot--didnt know there is a shuttle bus to the top until the 3rd day...
At Mindef,all i see was Stars..Crab..all ard. Sibei High ranking.. Feel like a F**K small fry inside...
But in MINDEF, there is no so call a "COOK HSU" but only a 2 storey canteen..Haizz..
Tat means i have to pay for any food i eat in there..But i only got a missereble of $420 each mth. HOW TO SURVICE???
the first day,Felt like a stranger in the canteen until i saw my Doctrine Head, MAJ Fu.*SP HAPPY**

After my meal, i realise something.
i asked Jeremy,the clerk,how to fill in the "starnet" form..
Then he called one of the member of VIsualling team and i speak to the guy.
He was the guy who speak to me on the phone the other time!!
but i just find his voice familar...???Was wonderig if its him a not..
He wanted to see me so he say he would come over..Then...
Ta RAaaa
He was just who i expected to be.my senoir fr DMD. Also a twins in their Yr.
And we all both r November baby...
He will be my upper studies too : )
On top of tat, he is wearing Civi..Maybe i will get the chance to wear
haha
ThenSometimes.. i realli think most of the things r Predestinated... haha Fate is behind everything i guess.I was suppose to Go to SAF film Unit for an interview(its on my previous post) but....it was postpone to Tuesday. But B4 i could go for the interview, my posting is out on the MONDAY..Gosh...so i called CPC and they said is alreadiset and i cant chose. HAaha so Bo bian loh.. i hope fate has given me the right choice ba..all this Tell Tale Signs...
: D

Oh Boy!! Wedding : )

2004-10-24T17:32:00.000+08:00

Today was my very 2nd time i attended a Chruch wedding!!-the first time is when i m still little.
Anyway, reali had a great time catching up w my DMD frenz. Meet quite a few..realli miss them man!
Haaha but realli made a fool of myself.Its my first time so i didn't really take the dress code into consideration..until i met them..Gosh!!
i felt like just turning back. Lucky Zhen Ping was there(my gd classmate/frenz!) she is so encouraging...haha trying to console me.. : )
anyway, i and her really came UNPREPARED.. never even got a GIFT!!
so we went to the nearby shops,hoping to see a suitable gift..But Its Serangoo Interchange..i dun even see a shopping mall!!
In the end, we just got a card. HAHA we actually tot maybe buying the "Good Luck!" card for Calvin.(u know life after marriage... :( feel sad 4 him...)
Then I made a stupid descision..i decide maybe i could get a shirt or sth more approperiate 4 the wedding so i n ZP went to a veri rundown shop. And i actually went to try the long Sleeve shirt!!
Darn..Wat was i thinking!!
Anyway...its cheap..$13 onli but realli wasnt my taste... :(
and all this trying..made us late..felt so sorry 4 ZP
In the bus Journey.. we were like Cuckoo, kept looking 4 streets name....first time there ma.luckily, when we Alight the bus, there is a lady also heading there..She was so cute..running and saying "further up.."so kind of her
We were on the dot.
just as we arrive, the bride's car came..
Then the bride,my lecturer miss Li ....She was SO BEAUTIFULL..All White..
anyway we entered the hall and everybody is like all seated alreadi..So Malu..
Anyway, i n ZP was wondering if we were realli late and then when we enter the Hall, would it be like i the movies :
Wooden door opens,then i would say "No!! Miss Li DON'T!!! I... I object!"
haha but too bad, its a glass door instead those in movies.. Big Wooden Door.

After the whole Long winded wedding ceremony.. finally get to Have "refreshment"
haha wat i and my frenz waited for. Haha But i never realli tot that my frenz, Mei, Would actually "Da bao" meaning pack the food. Gosh! she is so cool on her bike but she..."Da Bao???" haha

i realli write alot tis time... got to continue my web.. Sian.. still got Demo Reel..

2004-10-24T02:20:00.000+08:00

Me And My DMD frenzS!!! Gosh i guess i m too tall... i completely covered the cross behind....

Sucks.....

2004-10-23T08:00:00.000+08:00

Today..
was suppose to be an Impt date for me,to attend an interview to get into the SAF Film Unit.(i have been dreaming of this all this time after i got downgraded..my ONLY opportunity to get out of here,HENDON Camp!)
It was schedule at 3pm. So i think, If i leave my camp at 11.30pm,i should be able to go home, take my port folio,and make my way to SAFTI on time..

So i made the nessecary arrangement:
-I told my in-charge,Lta Ryan, who is kind enough and understanding enough to let me go off early.

Everything seem to be alright..
Then,i recieve a msg fr my frenz "my boss might not be coming today"
Shit!!
i am alreadi half way down to woodlands to get my port folio and this happen to ME?
I was totally lost..Then it started raining..."great!!"
I take a deep breath and re-organise my schedule.

Ok..
So the 1st thing to do is inform my dear frenz, Leo abt wat happen.
2nd is to make another interview date for me to meet nopefully,my future boss.
3rd is to get home and pass the mee-po to my dear mum..I guess she has been Straving..
But its raining....
By the time i reach home, i am already all drenched..
then.. I have to make my way down back To camp..SUCKS...
But its just my luck. Can't blame my frenz..I am already greatfull for him for pulling me in + his boss not free, also can't be blame.. : )

Maybe after all...tis is all fate arrangement. Maybe fate is trying to tell me tat i am not prepare for the interview...
I think i should go home and prepare more works like Demo Reel and the DSNV footage.
Or maybe.. i think too much.
alot of "maybe..."
haha

THE i n t e r vi e w

2004-10-23T00:10:00.000+08:00

*Worry Worry >_<
Later is going to be my interview...
Been thinking alot..

Have i prepare all the things i need?
Is my Port Folio GOOD enough?
I dun even have a Demo Reel in my port Folio..will they still want me?
What should i wear later..?

Guess i feel the stress my frenz had when were still Job hunters!!!

I guess i will let fate decide..

Then again...Wat will happen to me if i been rejected? (after all, SAF Film Unit only needs editor now..i dun really have experience in that..)

Slack SLACK SLack

2004-10-19T12:23:00.000+08:00

Have been in 2nd Company for quite some time.
What have i been doing?/
Watch VCD,Eat VCD, eat...
well i guess its my last few days of my "Holiday"
B4 i got post out to some design department...
but ... Mindef.. they haven called me to go 4 the interview..
wonder wat taking them so long..